Posts

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2 Months In

It’s been just over 2 months since my beautiful wife and I made the move to Johannesburg. We moved up here because I was offered a job as web designer and video production guy in the church that Lindsay grew up in.

The decision was not a small one for me because my heart burns for the coast. I was born at the coast and lived there until I was 28 and I just love the sea and the coastal culture and lifestyle so moving inland to a massive city like Joburg was a tough thing for me to imagine. Lindsay and I prayed a lot about the decision to move and we both knew it was the decision Jesus was leading us to make. Even knowing that I still wrestled. ‘Would God really want me to live somewhere I don’t want to live? Doesn’t He want what’s best for me?’. These, and many other questions like them filled my thoughts for weeks.

At that time we were staying at my Mom’s house and we were effectively on holiday, which was great, but it wasn’t a time free from concern about the future. I read a lot of books, prayed more than usual and got into God’s Word a bunch. I realized a lot of things in that time. Here are a few of those things:

  • God really is in control! (Col 1:17)
  • We can’t expect to be free from suffering or difficult times because we are children of God. Jesus is proof of that. He suffered more than we can really know and we should not think we are better than Jesus that we should be exempt from difficulties. (Jas 1:2-4)
  • God disciplines the child that He loves. Now the emphasis here is not on discipline, but rather on love! (Prov 3:11 & 12)
  • God is good and He does want the best for me. Since He knows everything there is to know it’s more than feesable that my idea of what’s best for me really isn’t what’s best for me and falls short of His ultimate wisdom. (Matt 7:9-11; Isa 55:8-10)
  • God is more interested in my character and my growth.
  • God sees my future and He leads me the way that He knows will be best for me. (Jer 29:11; Eph 3: 14-21)
  • He uses anything and everything for my good. (Rom 8:28)
  • I love Him and His Kingdom!! I love Him more than surfing or living at the coast, more than I thought I did. And I trust Him more than I think, or feel like, I do. These were both good realizations to come to for me.

Don’t get me wrong, moving here has still been tough and there are days when I miss the sea so much that it hurts and seeing photos of waves births a powerful longing in me, but I know why we are here and who it is that has us here.

It has been tough for us in Joburg for a number of reasons, but it has been really good in a lot of ways too. It’s been good for me to meet new people and to be more heavily involved in a good church for the first time in a long while.

It has been seriously awesome seeing my wife thrive in what she loves. One of the reasons I decided to move to Joburg is that Lindsay is a Sign Language interpreter. Yes, she can speak deaf. There isn’t much deaf-people-stuff for her to get involved in at the coast and she loves it and is really good at it so I knew that moving up here would be good for her. She has been doing so well! She interprets at church and I often find myself staring at her while she does and it makes me feel stoked to see her doing what she loves to do. She also got a job teaching at a school for deaf children and the story of how she got the job is really cool, but for another time.

God has really looked after us here (as He always does) and we wait to see what the future holds for the Rielly’s, but what I do know is that God is good, He is the ultimate Father and He wants what’s best for us!

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Is ‘fatherlessness’ really a problem?

I speak to a lot of people about the fact that their parent’s got divorced or that their dad bailed on them and a lot of those people say that they aren’t affected by it and never have been. I can’t say that they are all lying, but in my experience most of them are guilty of creating the fact that they are okay with it all. I find myself wanting to ask, ‘Are you trying to convince me or convince yourself?’ when they’re explaining.

Most people don’t want to seem weak or be vulnerable so they pretend that it’s all good. Or they don’t want to feel the emotions that go along with the experience so they tuck them away and convince themselves that the feelings never even existed to begin with. I did that for a long time. Now I don’t have any form of psychology degree or training so I’m not claiming to be and expert on this stuff, but I do have experience in the area and I can be pretty perceptive even if that is in my own opinion 🙂

The only reason I came to the place where I dealt with my emotions and insecurities Read more

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Fight or starve?

So this is my first official post. Let’s see how it goes…

I don’t know about you, but I take an extremely long time to make decisions. I often (if not always) over-analyze situations and what the consequences of decisions I make might be, so a lot of the time I just end up doing nothing and avoid deciding altogether. This is especially true when the decisions I have to make involve trusting people and believing that they will really do what they have said they will.

This stems from the fact that when a was a child my dad would regularly make promises to me about Read more