So this is my first official post. Let’s see how it goes…
I don’t know about you, but I take an extremely long time to make decisions. I often (if not always) over-analyze situations and what the consequences of decisions I make might be, so a lot of the time I just end up doing nothing and avoid deciding altogether. This is especially true when the decisions I have to make involve trusting people and believing that they will really do what they have said they will.
This stems from the fact that when a was a child my dad would regularly make promises to me about all sorts of things and almost never keep those promises. They were mostly promises about coming to see me or spend time with me. I know that he probably had good intentions and really did intend to see me all those times, but unfortunately good intentions just don’t keep a promise and children don’t understand the concept of intentions.
For me, trusting people to keep their promises is an extremely tense, nervous and fearful experience. Deciding to trust someone really feels like I’m putting myself in the firing line and I have to battle the thoughts and feelings that come flooding into my mind and heart. The problem with not trusting people is that you alienate yourself and end up very lonely. You can’t cultivate meaningful relationships because people need to be trusted to feel that a relationship is worth the effort.
A few weeks before I was planning to propose to my awesome wife, Lindsay, I had the most intense time trying to get past all the fear involved. I was seriously stressed and had a lot of my friends supporting me at the time. I knew she was the girl I wanted to marry and had no doubts about that, but the fear of having to trust her to never leave me was so intense that I was verging on a nervous breakdown. It was a real battle, a struggle, for me to deal with those fears, but if I had given in where would I be now? Very lonely and starved of the love and awesome relationship I have with my girl!
So what am I trying to say? Well, about two weeks ago I read this in the Bible:
Lamentations 4:9 (Amplified Bible)
Those who are slain with the sword are more fortunate than those who are the victims of hunger [slain by the famine]; for they [the hungry] pine and ebb away, stricken through for want of the fruits of the field.
Lamentations 4:9 (The Message) Better to have been killed in battle than killed by starvation.
Better to have died of battle wounds than to slowly starve to death.
Reading that really got me thinking! It’s better to fight, and die doing so, than it is to do nothing and starve to death. I could have let fear make my decision for me about whether to marry Lindsay or not and, if I had, that would have left me lonely and starving for love and companionship. Instead, I went into battle and fought my fears and mindsets and won! Could I have been’ killed’ or ‘severely injured’ in that battle? Yes! Without a doubt. But it was still well worth a shot. Better to die in battle than to die of starvation!
If we don’t try, or make any attempts at all, our chances of acheiving success are 0%. Nothing at all. But, even one small action towards a goal or one small effort to deal with an emotional problem (or a problem of any kind for that matter) infinitely increases the odds of success! I’ve been really encouraged to man up and step onto the battle field a bit more from now on – I hope you have to.
Hey, even if you don’t believe the Bible to be true, this is still a pretty good philosophy in my opinion and at least worth thinking about.
I hope you enjoyed the post and thanks so much for reading!